Seeing Ourselves in Others

A mirror is an instrument of evaluation to which we have all become accustomed.  Do you have any clue as to how many times a day you glance into a mirror to check out your appearance.  Hair straight?  Shirt buttoned right?  Any loose undergarments showing?  How is the 5 o'clock shadow progressing?  Is my lipstick still on?  Plus a myriad of other reasons.  Yes we use mirrors all the time to check on our physical appearance.  Recently I have had a revelation in which God explained to me that I was using other people as my mirror.  Perplexed?  As the Lord continued to gently nudge me into this understanding, my own confusion began to clear.  The clearer I understood His message, the more chagrined I became.

No matter who we are and no matter how far we have come in our walk with the Lord, we still have cracks in our armor, weaknesses in character and potential pitfalls in which we can somersault at any given moment.  Much as I would like to say the opposite, I am beginning to see as I age (yikes!) that some faults seem to become more distinct than they used to be.  What is up with that???  Perhaps it is because I am more aware of them and the impact they have on others.  Whereas when I was younger, there was a lot more gray (and not my hair!) in my life.  I don't believe that I possessed as deep a relationship with my Lord and consequently His Word was not rooted as deeply into my spirit.  The result was that some behaviors and some language would creep into my life and slip by unnoticed - well relatively speaking.

Today I find a very uncomfortable emotion slipping into my brain - judgment.  I find myself looking at others at times with critical eyes that I know are not of my Lord, certainly not walking in divine love as He did.  When I catch myself in this act, I loathe what I have just thought and find myself thinking, "What has happened to me???"  Through God's inimitable grace and love, He is beginning to open the eyes of my heart and show me.  I am looking through a future mirror when I look at others in certain aspects and I feel as if that will be me.  The aspects are not important.  They are different for all of us.  The root however is fear.  I know better than to allow the spirit of fear to run my life, however this was not a recognizable fear.  It is so subtle that it comes out as judgment and criticism.  

What are the things that disturb you the most about other people?  I am not going to presume to guess for you.  If you will just sit still and listen to Holy Spirit speak to you, I believe that He will reveal to you what frightens you the most about yourself when you look at other people.  Another person's downfall can just as easily be mine, except for God's mercy and grace in my life.  I am as weak as my brother or sister because we all depend upon His strength to carry us through life.  

Do you remember the comparison of the Pharisee and the tax collector? Luke 18:9-14 To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men--robbers, evildoers, adulterers--or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.'  "But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.'  "I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted." I have no doubt that each one of us when reading this is repulsed by the Pharisee's behavior.  Yet when I dig deeply into some of my thought patterns, I question if I am any better than that Pharisee.  What do we really mean in our hearts when we say in good "Southern speak", "Bless their little hearts"?  When I first moved to Atlanta, I would say that with a genuine spirit, but I have to admit that 7 years in the true South has slanted the intonation of my voice, much to my chagrin.  

The last thing that God has ever wanted from us was to compare ourselves to our fellow man.  He is clear that there is only one standard - His.  I know that I cannot match that standard.  So consequently, have I lowered my standards and started comparing myself to others in a vain attempt to not feel so inadequate?  The concept that we must grasp is that Jesus died so that we can enter into the presence of the Almighty, not because of what we have or have not done; not because we are good enough to be called His; and certainly not because we are better than someone else.  We are equal in His eyes.  We have to believe that He accepts us "as we are" striving to be more like Him in our every thought and deed. 

I am entering a period of 40 days of prayer and fasting beginning midnight tonight.  Although the Lord has been very clear that there are specific areas about which He desires for me to commune with Him, I also have a very clear sense that He is going to reveal much to me about going to the next level with Him.  There is a lot of work for this gal to do to prepare my heart, body and spirit to be at that next level with Him.  I am eager to empty myself of me and make more room for Him.  There is only one reflection I want to see when I look in any mirror and that is His.  It is a process.  Eternity will provide the resolution, but until that time, I am going to continue in the process of burning off the dross and progressing to refined silver that will give Him His reflection when He gazes upon me.  I hope you will do the same.