Coloring Inside the Lines

You may not remember learning to color as a child, but if you have children or grandchildren, you can easily identify with the slow progression from scribbling to blobs of color to finally being able to color a picture outlined in the coloring book. Recently I have come to understand the parallel between coloring and living life. I do vividly recall how good it felt to finally produce a colored picture that was worthy of being viewed. I had learned how to color the outlines very boldly before filling in the spaces with lightened strokes. I had finally mastered the art of coloring inside the lines. How little I realized that this was a pattern I would call my own in living life.

The expectations that we perceive others having about us become the lines of our life pictures. As long as I know what those expectations are, I can live within the lines, not cause a disruption by venturing past those heavily outlined edges of my life/picture. The unfortunate aspect about living life that way is that we seldom know the reality of those expectations. Everything is distorted by our own perspectives. What I think I know about what is inside someone else's head is seldom what is really there. Yet I have set up the boundaries of my life based on those perceived lines.
I truly believed I had let go of all of those "performance" issues that have driven me all of my life.  However, a little conversation, a really little conversation, awakened me to the reality that there are still some roots there that I have not pulled up.  My guess is that for some of you, the same is true.  No matter how hard we try to let go and learn to go with the flow, there are often times aspects of our history that still linger.

What I now realize is that I am moving through daily life trying to stay one step ahead of what I think the people in my life are expecting me to do for them.  Notice the language there - the emphasis is on do.  It is very important to understand that these are not spoken "requests".  Rather, it is the underlying unspoken that I sense is driving me.  I have been an overachiever all of my life.  Perfection reigned supreme because that was how I grew up.  My life now should not be ruled by that principle because I am living in a different time and a different season, but there are little prickles that pop up and I now realize that deep in my subconscious I am thinking, "The lines just changed.  How am I supposed to stay in them now?"

I want you to think about this for a moment.  You have planned your day and are halfway through it when you get a phone call that indicates there has been a change that now impacts the second half of your day.  The mature thing is to adapt and move forward.  After all this is life and nothing is guaranteed to stay the same.  Instead there is that little sigh that escapes and you think, oh great.  Now what? 

The key that I am searching for is the one that unlocks my ability to be flexible and not be caught off guard by changes in my life.  I remember back in the days when I used to do seminars on time management.  I would tell people to plan for interruptions, put time in your schedule for the unexpected.  How quickly we forget our own advice. But this is not about time management.  This is about not experiencing a loss of control and a depreciation in your self esteem just because an outside event or person has changed your day, or even your life.  And that my friends is really what is happening in this scenario.  It is the belief that my inability to stay inside my predetermined lines of life with my crayon is a direct reflection on who I am and my self worth.

Ultimately what we all need to understand and to believe is that God loves us for who we are and not what we do.  I have to continually remind myself of this simple yet profoundly important fact.  In addition, the people that really matter in my life also love me for who I am and not what I do for them.  The sad thing for many of us is that we have bought into the lie that the opposite is true.  If we were to really look at our life and our relationships through God's eyes of transparency, we would realize that there are many many people in our lives who do indeed love us just because.  Let us embrace that and return the favor - love the people in your life for who they are and not what they do or do not do.  We would all be so much better off and so much more relaxed if we did. 

Slinky Living

So, did I catch your attention with that title?? It really is not what you think at first reaction.  The kind of slinky I am referring to is the toy that you may have played with as a kid (or an adult - after all they really are fun!)  Recently I was honored to speak to a women's group and the Lord gave me such a powerful visualization for them that I just have to share it with you.  Everyone that has heard it so far has identified with it.  I pray the same is true today.  

Life is tough sometimes - well in reality, a lot of times.  Lately it seems that everyone who is dear to me is struggling with some circumstance in their lives.  All of us must handle life's transitions at different points.  Usually we cannot prevent these circumstances from coming .  Sometimes we do bring them on by our choices, but even then once the momentum has started we must walk things out.  The choice we have is how we walk it out.  The Lord showed me three simple options.  Which one are you using?  

First we have the turtle. When a turtle is threatened, he pulls everything exposed in and shuts out the world.  How like us sometimes.  Life is too painful and instead of confronting it, we just withdraw.  Close up.  Paralysis sets in.  Do you think that this is God's choice for us?  Hebrews 10:32-36 remind us of what we should expect.   Remember those earlier days after you had received the light, when you stood your ground in a great contest in the face of suffering.  Sometimes you were publicly exposed to insult and persecution; at other times you stood side by side with those who were so treated. You sympathized with those in prison and joyfully accepted the confiscation of your property, because you knew that you yourselves had better and lasting possessions. So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.  Doesn't sound like turtle mode does it?

Second option - the yo-yo.   Remember playing with these toys?  Excitedly you looped that string around your finger and tossed it out knowing that it would come right back to you...well maybe...well maybe not.  Then it just hangs there swinging back and forth, back and forth like a pendulum.  Relate that to life.  We want to be in action, we know we need to make some decisions.  So we do, but the ones we make don't move us forward.  We just go from high to low to high and back again.  We get caught in the rut of same old same old.  We talk to the same people, we do the same things, we fail to step out of the comfort zone to move forward in the direction God is calling us.  The movement feels good but it is a false sense of security.  We have been deceived into thinking that we are following the will of God just because we are moving.  James 1:2-4 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  Hmm God's choice for us ~ the yo-yo?

So that leaves option three - the slinky. When God begins to move us from one stage of our life to the next, it is very much like a slinky.  We are on one level and God says it is time to stretch and move to the next level.  For a brief time we are between the two levels with part of us leaving the old and part of us arriving at the new.  However there are several powerful aspects of being in slinky mode that we must grasp.

#1 While stretched in between the old and the new, we are exposed for many to see our witness.  When we have it "all together" our impact is much smaller - we are less visible.  But stretched out many can see what is going on and witness the power of God in our lives.

#2 While stretched, the glory of God can shine through us whereas when we are all together we can be rather opaque and we are visible versus His glory being visible.  It may appear to those observing that it is through our strength that we have it all together whereas when we are stretched, it is clearly His strength that is keeping us from breaking.  By the way, He knows exactly what our capacity to stretch is and He will not allow us to break.  Isaiah 41:9-10 I have called you back from the ends of the earth so you can serve me. For I have chosen you and will not throw you away. Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand. 

#3 Until we release the old level to embrace the new level, we will stay stretched.  God requires us in trusting Him to let go of our present circumstances and move into our new circumstances.  Only then can we rest in our new place and be prepared to move to the next.  Living out God's will requires movement.  We cannot stay in one place, one level and still grow with Him and follow His will for our lives.  Only in releasing will we truly embrace this journey that He has planned for us from the foundations of time.

So the questions for you to ponder are which one of these describes you and are you operating as God desires.  Remember the circumstances are what they are.  Our choice is how are we going to respond to them.  My prayer is that we all will desire to be sanctified slinkies.  Shalom.